demi/division (brokengrrlie) wrote in londnundrground,

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this lullaby

So I finished the book already... it's so good, I couldn't even put it down and actually got maybe a little teary-eyed at the end. It's about this girl who is so against love that nothing could ever change her mind, except one certain boy who is her complete opposite. As they always are. Makes you think a lot, made me think way too much... it's a definate read.

  • "It sucks to wait, though," she said, taking a sip of it. "I mean, for everything to begin." ... "This is just the in-between time," I said. "It goes faster than you think."

  • some guys got all indignant and pissed, some whined and cried, some acted indifferent and cold, as if you couldn't leave fast enough.

  • I had no illusions about love anymore. It came, it went, it left casualties or it didn't. People weren't meant to be together forever, regardless of what the songs say.

  • .. for a second it was like he was the only one awake or even alive in all the world right then, except for me.

  • "because dammit, you make it really hard to love you sometimes. You know that? You really do."

  • On my plate my food was cold, just like my hard, hard heart.

  • Because I didn't show weakness: I didn't depend on anyone. And if he'd been like the others, and just let me go, I would have been fine. It would have been easy to go on conveniently forgetting as I kept my heart clenched tight, away from where anyone could get to it.

  • What did it feel like, I wondered, to love someone that much? So much that you couldn't even control yourself when they came close, as if you might just break free of whatever was holding you and throw yourself at them with enough force to easily overwhelm you both.

  • Watching him go. What a weird feeling that was. I decided I didn't like it. Not at all.

  • "And love is needing someone. Love is putting up with someone's bad qualities because they somehow complete you."

  • I had come so close to wanting to be wrong about the possibilities of what the heart could really do. Give me proof, I'd said, and she had tried. It's not tangible, she'd said, you can't mark it so clearly. But against love, the case was solid. Easily argued. And you could, indeed, hold it in your hand.

  • I just sat there. This was it, what I'd always wanted. The official out, the moment I was finally set free. But it didn't feel the way I'd thought it would. Instead of a wash of victory, I felt strangely alone, as if everything fell away suddenly, leaving me with only the sound of my own heart beating. It scared me.
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